Monday, January 7, 2013


That is really weird to say (even in my head).  Twenty Thirteen.  My mind can barely wrap itself around that date.  Seriously.  I'm kind of stuck in the 80's or maybe 90's in my brain.  Not that life has stood still or anything, but that's the age I still feel like I am -- in my 20's or 30's, maybe early 40's.  Yeah, reminds me of when I really was in my 20's and my dad said to me "I still feel the same inside as I did when I was younger. My body feels older but inside I feel just the same."  I nodded and smiled, I'm sure, but in my mind I was thinking "ummmm, yeeeeeeeeeeeeah, sure you do dad".  Now I know just what he meant (and all the 20 and 30somethings are nodding and thinking "ummmm, yeeeeeeeeeah, sure you do Beth". (Ok, I know I've posted this little story before, maybe more than once, but it just seemed to fit here.  I promise this is the last time for that little story :))

I have been thinking about my blogs lately.  I haven't been posting much at all.  Too busy, I guess, and maybe not interested?  When I started this blog I was pretty motivated to write about my life, and I seemed to have a lot of angst.  I don't know if I have mellowed or if my angst has just migrated somehow.  I'm more negative in general, I think, but I don't feel as much dissatisfaction.  I think that's good.  I also think it would be good for me to be less negative.  So, t hat's what I'm going to work on for 2013 (which I just typed as 2012, because I am in deep, deep denial).

I'm planning to start the practice of Examen with a good friend from college.  I'm hoping that will help me get back on a positive track, and maybe that will ripple out and help me be more productive and not such a procrastinator.  Is that too much to expect of it?  Have any of my many (haha) readers practiced Examen?  Do you even know what it is?  You can read about it here and here, although those talk about it as a singular activity, and I am planning on doing it with someone else.  This book is what I am using as a guide.  If you have practiced this, please share your experiences.  I'm hoping to make it a weekly practice, although much of what I read talks about it as a daily practice.

We had a nice trip to visit family for the holidays, but returned home just before returning to work, so things are feeling kind of scattered.  Teaching art continues to fulfill me in many ways while overwhelming me at the same time.  I love it, though.  And adjusting to two in college continues to be a work in progress.  I miss them, terribly sometimes, but life adjusts to the new rhythms and feels good too.

Happy New Year!